Day: January 6, 2016

How we feel entitled and how to avoid it

Does just because you have “it” mean I should have it “it”?

envy

 

I’m getting kind of tired of the assumption that because one person should have something, everyone else should, too.

For example, my husband and I have a home. Does that mean someone who hasn’t worked hard, gone to school and saved their money should have a home just because I do? Is a home a right? Where is that guaranteed?

Seems to me we’ve forgotten the “pursuit” part of  the “pursuit of happiness”.

Because another couple we know have two beautiful homes and plenty of money mean I should? They haven’t worked any harder so why don’t I have what they have? That’s easy. One of the spouses comes from a wealthy family.

My husband and I have college educations and beyond, as do our children. Should everyone? We worked hard to pay for our educations and for our children’s. We don’t come from money. On the contrary.

As long as we think something is “owed” us, we will be dissatisfied with what we have.

envy

As long as we’re worried about us, we won’t be worried about those who face life and death struggles every day. As long as we’re mad and angry about those who have more than us, we won’t buckle down, get an education, move forward.

As long as we’re looking inward, we won’t be looking upward and outward.

I find it amazing when people assume that those who have more than themselves didn’t work hard to get there.

How ridiculous.

We know a couple who live in a beautiful log home settled on forty acres. We can see ourselves in that home. But when we heard how hard they worked sanding and staining every single log, how hard it is to maintain, we lost our envy.

I don’t know who said it, but we should find a way to love the life we’re leading (in general) while always seeking to make it better. I certainly don’t think that means we just put up with status quo if the status quo is not good, but that we move forward from a position of strength  rather than weakness.

In my book, dissatisfaction and envy make us weak, not strong.

The couple I mentioned earlier with the two beautiful homes? They shop at Walmart for their clothes, do their own landscaping, their own remodeling, etc. Even tho’ they have inherited doesn’t mean they don’t work hard to maintain what they have acquired.

Let’s quit looking at other people to gauge our own level of contentment. I can almost guarantee that the more we compare ourselves to others the less happy we are.

poison envy

I’ve been there and done my own fair share of comparing. It has never served me well.

For this next year, if you find yourself sayings like, “I don’t understand why I don’t have that? I don’t know why they’re so lucky? I’ve worked as hard as they have.”

Almost always, we never know the effort they’ve expended to get where they are. More than likely, we haven’t.

And it doesn’t have to be material things. How about envying someone because they seem so happy?

And happiness? Happiness is a state of mind and everyone has a mind. Everyone decides for themselves what they choose to think.

(Can you tell this post was inspired by something I just heard, read, or saw?)

Anyway, God bless and I hope you have  a good day.

 

 

 

 

 

 

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