Tag: hope

God is in your tomorrow

alphabet of thanks, “T”

Today I’m thankful for “TOMORROWS“.

Isn’t it great we have tomorrows to look forward to? When things are going bad, it’s great that we have a “tomorrow” that might be brighter.

I can remember times in my life when I went to bed at night, grateful for the sweet relief of sleep and the small hope that tomorrow might be better.

Sometimes “tomorrows” are all we have.

                               Tomorrows hold promise.

                               Tomorrows offer hope.

                               Tomorrows make today’s problems seem temporary.

But tomorrow is also a day not to “borrow” from.  According to scripture, each day has enough trouble on its own. I’ll admit I don’t always get that right.

Matthew 6:25-34New International Version (NIV)

25 “Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothes? 26 Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? 27 Can any one of you by worrying add a single hour to your life[a]?

28 “And why do you worry about clothes? See how the flowers of the field grow. They do not labor or spin. 29 Yet I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these. 30 If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, will he not much more clothe you—you of little faith? 31 So do not worry, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ 32 For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. 33 But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. 34 Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.

It’s hard to trust in the future because it is the future. Only God knows what our futures hold. And most of the time, he’s not telling us.  

I haven’t experienced a bad episode of anxiety for a long time.  But the other night I woke up and was frightened. I thought about the people I love and “What would I do if something happened to them”.

I know what triggered it. The husband of a dear friend of mine has prostate cancer. It was completely unexpected. His PSA from the year before had been normal. I projected that to my husband even though his results had just come back and his numbers were very low.

I immediately asked God to help me trust him.

I didn’t beat myself up for my doubt. When we lose a loved one (my mother, six months ago), and when people around us get sick, we can’t help but be reminded that life is not only fragile, it is fleeting.  That’s a good thing.

Do you realize we are the only living beings that know we are going to die, that we, are temporary. That’s pretty humbling, isn’t it? And yet, even with feeling that way at times, it doesn’t really change us all that much.

I find that curious.

So all we truly have is the reality of today and the hope of a tomorrow.

When I had my devotions that morning, I gave thanks to God praising Him that he’s already waiting for me in my future, no matter what it is. He has prepared the way for me and walks ahead of me clearing the path to Him.

God is in your tomorrow

He does that for all His children. He is in your future as well.

God bless and have a good day.

 

 

 

Why I like the word “sin”

There must be something wrong with me. I like the word “sin”. I find it so liberating.

“Liberating?” you ask in wonderment.

Yep.

I find when I call my bad habits what they are, sin, I know I have recourse. If I just think of them as bad habits, then I am forced to change them all by myself. I have to read the books, practice the methods, and maybe I can change them.

But if I call them “sin”, I know just what to do.

First, I confess them to God. That means that I am forgiven. When I am forgiven, I have hope.

Immediately.

I don’t have to change anything before I can have that hope.

Next, I can ask God to enable me to change my habits. At this point, I might very well research some methods. I might very well read those books. But now I have a source of empowerment to help me facilitate those changes.

But it all starts with realizing that if I have a  bad habit more than likely it is causing a distance between God and me. More than likely I am “missing the mark” which is the definition of sin anyway.

I am not suggesting that we have to label all our less-than-desirable habits as “bad”. What I am suggesting is that the habits we have that get in the way of our relationship with God are more than bad habits, they are sin.

God has a remedy for sin. It’s called confession.

So the next time you feel overwhelmed with your bad habits, use your words. Call them what they are. To me, the remedy for sin is laid out many places in the Bible. Bad habits, not so much.

Just a quick aside here. King David had a bad habit of looking out his window at Bethsheba undressing. We know how that ended, don’t we?

Don’t be afraid of the word “sin”. It’s a good word.

God bless and have a good day.

 

 

 

broken heart

My heart broke again last night

Just a short post today.

Last night, I made it official. I sold my mother’s house, furnishings and all, to my brother at well below market value.

I knew it would be hard to hand over my garage door opener. It was my “key” to her home. It was harder than I thought. I feel like I’ve closed a door.

My brother lived with my mom for the last eight years because he needed a place to live. That was hard for me, too. It was not a good living arrangement in the beginning. My mom regretted her decision for a while but gradually it turned out to be a really good arrangement. They both made their peace with each other and my brother came through for her in the final few months.

I knew this was what she would want but to know I can’t access her house like I could before is really hard.

Sometimes doing the right thing really hurts. Really, really hurts.

broken heart

We leave today to pick up our little grandson for a week. I will be so busy, I won’t have too much time to think about it so the timing is good, I guess.

I guess there is a bright side. I don’t have to clear out the house and get it ready to sell. Maybe God prompted this for that very reason. That might have been even harder.

Anyway, if you’re facing difficult times, remember you are not alone. For every situation we find ourselves in, someone has probably gone through it before. Sometimes it helps to know that. Not always, but sometimes.

God bless and have a good day.

 

 

 

hope

How can reality and hope really co-exist?

I haven’t had to cry this morning.

The Hospice nurse who came out yesterday said my mom’s lungs sound a little better!!!!

I know it’s too soon to hope but “two weeks ” to “she’s doing a little better?” Really?

So I find myself living in a kind of limbo, the place between reality and hope. It’s a hard place to live.

It’s like this picture. Nothing can grow in concrete. Right?

Wrong.

All it takes is a crack and life can shoot up.

hope

I got to sit with my mom a few minutes but then she wanted to get cleaned up, brush her teeth, have some coffee. And then the nurse came, yada, yada.

This last week has been a roller coaster. But here’s what I learned.

First of all, don’t be afraid to ask questions of everyone. Doctors, nurses, aides, social workers. EVERYONE. And you can learn as much from the non-professional staff as you can from the medical professionals.

It is only when you hear a lot from a lot of people in various occupations that you get the full picture. It’s good I don’t have any inhibitions in this area. Hospice told me to call with any questions and I did, as many as I needed and as often as I needed.

I’ve never been reticent when it comes to protecting and guarding my loved ones.

In fact, if you need an example (these posts certainly haven’t been very uplifting lately), here’s a funny story.

My son was an assistant coach for a football team for awhile. My daughter-in-law and I were at one of his games. A man a few rows in front of us started “bad mouthing” the coach. I got madder and madder. The game ended and I followed him for a few feet before I tapped him on his shoulder and told him to “Turn around”.

He did and I lambasted him loudly in front of a number of bystanders. I told him I was the “coach’s mom” and I didn’t appreciate his remarks and he better knock it off at future games. I was maybe six inches from his face. My poor daughter-in-law was mortified. She pulled me away and we left.

No one messes with a mama bear, at least not this one.

But here’s what happened the next day. This same man went to my son’s office and apologized.

So there!

I’m like that with my mom, too. I will continue to be her strongest advocate. Like today, when a social worker called and wanted to set up a time to visit her. I said, “She’s had enough prodding and probing” and “I’ll let you know when you can come.”

Since when did dying (if that’s what she’s doing) become so complicated? Everybody has to justify their job and nobody coordinates their services. I’ve answered the same questions over and over again from different people for different reasons for days. How many intake forms do you need anyway? Don’t misunderstand, I’m happy with all the help we’ve received and would recommend Hospice to anyone. They’ve been wonderful.

But when you’re already overwhelmed, the lack of clarity takes it toll. But at least now I feel like I’m on sure footing. I think I understand what is happening with my mom and as far as her prognosis, God is the ultimate decider.

I hope I get to the summer so I can sit with her on her deck, drink iced tea, and watch the birds. That’s what I’m praying for but I’m well aware it might not turn out that way and I’ll have to remember those times rather than experience them again. I like to think I’m being realistic and hopeful at the same time.

God bless and have a good day.

ps. I wrote this yesterday morning to post for today, Thursday. Since then, my mom has become stronger each day. Her appetite has returned. My brother and I are beside ourselves. All I need is for some abnormally warm weather and we are going to sit on her deck.

 

 

sunshine/2017

What a week-end. You HAVE to read this!

Today’s post is all about hope.

god-can-do-more/2017

Most of you know that the last two weeks have been rough. My mom has been very confused and delusional. She has been diagnosed with dementia. Read that carefully, “diagnosed with dementia”, and we all know how a single diagnosis can be inadequate to explain all aspects of any condition. While I don’t deny that diagnosis, I don’t buy into it one hundred percent as an explanation for these past two weeks. I believe there is more going on.

Did you know, for example, that urinary tract infections (UTI), can come and go without medical intervention? Did you also know that UTI’s can cause confusion, delirium, and hallucinations in the elderly? So-o-o-o, an elderly person can be confused, etc, because they have an undiagnosed UTI. We had my mom checked out for that and it was negative but, of course, it might have cleared up by the time the test was done. Here’s the google page where I found some great links about UTI’s in the elderly.

Now to the weekend. My daughter and her five-year-old son came home this weekend. (Hubby and other son had a “guys” weekend skiing.) She wanted to see her grandmother again because of her failing health. Not only was my mom one hundred percent better, she was back to her “before-the-last-fall” better. We took her for a ride down to Lake Michigan because we had an unusually warm day for a Michigan January. We even got her outside to sit on a bench. She was conversant, funny, even taking the initiative in the conversation.

Thank goodness it was sunny and I was wearing my sunglasses because I was tearing up a lot with gratitude. And now to the point of this post today.

The two or three nights prior to Sat I woke up in the middle of the night feeling very sad because I was worried that my last memories of my mom would be what I’d seen the last two weeks. I so wanted to see my “real” mom again. And then it happened.

But God answered and one glorious, beautiful, warm Saturday, I was able to imprint some kinder memories in my mind. There are some days you just know you won’t forget. This was one of them. My daughter will never forget it either.

 sunshine/2017

I had been praying hard for this to happen but was starting to lose hope. But I reminded myself once again that “God is able to do more than we can even think of or even ask….”

god-can-do-more/2017

I’m smart enough to know those two weeks could happen again. Sunday, for example, she wasn’t quite as “sharp” as she’d been on Saturday although she was still able to converse fluently.

But that Saturday was my “more than I can imagine” day. Everyone needs one of those.

God bless and don’t give up your hopes. God can do more than you can even think of.

 

 

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