I was talking to someone yesterday who struggles with something.
I think we’ve all been there. We all struggle, just with different things.
Some people struggle with low self-esteem.
Some struggle with addictions.
Some with bad habits.
Some with chronic health problems, mental or emotional. I could go on, couldn’t I?
There are as many different conditions and disorders that people struggle with as there are people.
As I thought about what I said, I thought about me at her age. What would I have liked someone to say to me?
But before I do that, I want to share what I wouldn’t say.
I wouldn’t say, “Be Yourself.” I wouldn’t say that because it takes a long time to find out who we are. I think it’s a lifetime pursuit.
I wouldn’t say, “Don’t care about what other people think”. I wouldn’t say that because it’s been my experience that a lot of the time, other people are right and what they think is right. It’s way too easy to disregard others opinion because “It’s our life and we can do we want.”
We can’t always do what we want, no matter what all those cute little “memes” suggest.
I wouldn’t say, “It will all turn out OK”. Why? Because, frankly, sometimes, it doesn’t.
Actually, I think my best advice, would be this:
Live your life with courage.
Almost every difficult circumstance, illness, struggle, requires courage.
The courage to get up each morning and put one foot in front of another no matter how painful. The most courageous people are those who manage to live within their struggles without becoming bitter or blaming anyone else. Courage is not limited to age, gender, nationality. It’s not defined by education or success.
I know a number of people I would call courageous. They all share one trait:
They show up.
That’s really the best definition of courage, just “showing up”.
People who accomplish great feats aren’t necessarily courageous because, for the most part, they do what they do because they love it. I don’t think courage can be defined by dare-devil accomplishments.
I’m going to use someone as an example who “showed up” recently and I am surprising myself here because I had some negative vibes about her.
Tonya Hardy (if you don’t know who she is, you can find out about her here.) has not garnered a lot of positive reactions from people. They have viewed her as brassy, rude, and worse, an accomplice to a crime. But even if she was, she has paid a big price. And when you read about her upbringing, you can understand why she talks and acts the way she does. And then there is the fact that she was very young when all the drama happened.
So her appearance on DWTS (Dancing With the Stars) was very courageous. She even admitted she was worried how the audience would respond to her. You could tell she was actually afraid. But she “showed up” on the show and got out on the dance floor. No matter what you think of her, that was courageous. And, by the way, she was surprisingly very good.
No matter what one thinks of her, it takes courage to agree to be on the show knowing millions of people will be watching you and knowing you are not well-liked. I found myself feeling some sympathy for her.
So today if you’re feeling like you just don’t have the strength to get through another day, all you have to do is “show up” for just one more day, and then do that every day and pretty soon you will surprise yourself. You will have become a courageous person.
God bless and have a good day.
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