Table of Contents

• When at a crossroads
• Back to square one
• When not everyone is going to be happy
• A flashback
• The rest of the story
• Give it enough time
• God gives wisdom when we ask

(This was written during my mom’s illness. )

When at a crossroads

Sometimes it’s hard to know if God is telling us to change course or if it’s the enemy’s (you can call him what you want) way of causing us to doubt what God has revealed.   

It would be wonderful if life were easy to figure out. Maybe for some people, it is. Their life is easy, without conflict and things just fall into place. My life is not like that. At this point, it seems there’s always something up in the air.

And just a few hours ago, it got a lot more complicated. Our decision is whether we should leave on a trip tomorrow or not. If I had days to write and you had days to read, I still wouldn’t be able to explain all the details. 

So once again I’m on my knees, if only figuratively. This morning the decision was made to go. We’ve rented the car. We’ve stopped the mail. We’re completely packed. Are you getting the picture?

Back to square one

Guess what? We are back to square one and I’m having to reconsider again. But I’m very proud of the fact that wisdom has been provided and once again I’m on the right track in my thinking. Tomorrow’s doctor’s appointment will seal the deal one way or the other.

 I”ve had a number of people who thought we should go ahead with our plans regardless.

What do we do if our decision is going to cause pain? It depends on the pain and who’s going to feel it, doesn’t it? Whose pain is going to be greater? Why does it even have to be about their pain or ours? I didn’t realize until I started to post tonight that this is what this decision is all about. Her pain or mine? 

But sometimes another’s discomfort is not enough of a reason to change our plans.  

When not everyone is going to be happy

So here I am tonight. Not looking forward to tomorrow. Knowing there’s no way, no matter what decision I make, that I’m going to satisfy everyone.

God knew all this was going to happen so He must have a plan. Tomorrow it will unfold. I am trusting God will once again give me a red flag if going ahead with our trip is wrong. If He doesn’t I’m going to assume it’s a “go”. 

If I’m confused tomorrow about what to do, it will be my own confusion that I must muddle through.

A flashback

I can still remember how difficult this decision-making process was. My emotions were all over the place. I felt torn between my mother and my husband, although my husband was completely supportive if we had to stay home.

Strangely enough, we were at this same place just last year. This time we made a completely different decision and that turned out to be the right decision as well. Very similar circumstances but a very different decision. Here’s the rest of the story.

The rest of the story

There is no confusion, no doubt, and no regrets with this decision to stay home. The wisdom God gave was clear.

Do I wish we could still go?

Of course.

Am I disappointed?

Of course.

But whose pain would be the worse? Who might tolerate the pain the best? Her pain would be worse if I left.

Mine I can handle.

Give it enough time

As I fell asleep that night, I reminded myself of Proverbs 3:5 & 6. “Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not to your own understanding.  In all your ways acknowledge him and He will direct your paths.”

He did. God’s wisdom was abundant.

I knew the next morning what my decision would be. It came as easily as deciding between coffee with cream, or without. It kind of surprised me how quickly I came around. I didn’t fight against it. It was simply the right decision and needed no more thought.

I’ve looked back over my process of decision-making and realize it’s been right on track. It hasn’t been without emotion or without a lot of going back and forth. It certainly hasn’t been without a lot of prayer. But I am remembering I am called to do the hard thing sometimes.

I had a “feeling” of peace. Not like the world gives but the kind we experience when there is no reason to. 

We experience peace because we’ve made the right decision; we aren’t confused. But that doesn’t mean there’s an overwhelming feeling of relief. That may take a while BUT:

The right decision is the right decision.

The peace that God provides passes human understanding. We can’t explain it. But we know when we have it. Knowing we’ve made the right decision results in quiet confidence. A quiet confidence that God has done the leading and we have done the following.

Don’t get me wrong. I’m disappointed my plans had to be canceled. I was so looking forward to relaxing in the sun.

Collecting shells on the beach.

Reading one book after another.

Walking the beach and listening to the waves.

My anger and frustration over the past few days have been wondrously replaced with understanding and love. 

God gives wisdom when we ask

God is so good. When we ask for wisdom, He gives it. We may take many detours to find it, or we may have to muddle through many options. We may take one path only to turn around and take another less traveled. It may seem as if God’s playing with us. We feel like a hamster on a wheel that God keeps turning. But if we hang in there, the wheel stops and we can get off.

I hope the only decisions I have to make for a while are what I’m going to wear. 

I’m as happy today with that decision as I was back then. God’s wisdom continues to guide me.

God bless and have a good day.

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